That's (virtual) Life!

I have had quite a week. To tell you the truth, this is pretty much the way my life has rolled for a long time. Last week began with both of my adult children in the hospital via the ER and admitted. Then I became sick as well, and got loaded down with medication and relieved of my money by the pharmacy. The week then ended with the breakdown of my van and what could have been a very expensive repair. Fortunately, with the help of a couple of dear friends, I avoided a towing bill this time and minimal cost for a used alternator from the junkyard. Instead of writing a check from a badly depleted checking account, I asked for a little help from my friends. I have great friends, but I don't spend a lot of actual time with them in person. It is so much easier, seemingly, to email or call or use some kind of technological interface to connect with others. Our time is so used up with virtual life that we hardly have time for an actual one. By the time I get finished checking my email and attending to my virtual farming, I barely have time to shower before the pizza delivery guy gets here.

I have a very difficult time asking for help from anyone and I always have. I was brought up to be self-sufficient, but that doesn't always work too well in the world we live in. I have seen many people in the same boat these days. It is sometimes hard to preach self-sufficency when parents have to allow their children to come back home because for one reason or another, their finances went south, or you have failed to successfully launch an adult child. Some people who have never had to rely on food stamps have been forced to ask for them, or go to a food pantry or a church for help for feeding and clothing the extra people. For a conservative to have to rely on government help, feels really wrong and to some people looking on, it looks like hypocrisy. I have been thinking a lot about how we spend our money these days, and why we spend it on the things we do.

Life has gotten a lot harder these days, in my humble opinion. We suffer from information overload, and unprecedented dents in our personal privacy. We are wired from head to toe, every day. Our technology has advanced so exponentially, that it is possible for people with very limited incomes to have cell phones, and computers with internet access. These gadgets have become as necessary to most of the people I know as basic utilities like water and electricity. As a matter of fact, I know many people who would pay their cell phone bills or their internet providers BEFORE they would pay their other utilities, if they could only pay one or the other. Everyone I know is having money trouble of some kind, and technology is creating strange addictions that are contributing to the financial meltdowns and the demise of face to face relationships.

Is anyone still not on Facebook? I can't remember what life was like before I got started. Young and old have joined in social networking. It can be a good thing, or a very bad thing. Over the last year, I have found out things about my family and friends that I probably would never have known before due to social networks. That hasn't always been good news. I know that people have found out more about my family than I have actually wanted to be broadcast. Not trying to hide anything in particular, but do we really want all our business cast abroad on Twitter or Myspace, or Facebook? I have seen fights started and escalated and relationships ended over these networks. Many of us are clearly addicted to this new type of communication. Facebook says on its login page that it is "free, and always will be". But internet access clearly is not free, nor are cell phones. I grew up with free television, but that is another "necessity" that has gobbled up part of our paychecks in the last two decades. It became a necessity for most people, but clearly people must have lived happy lives for hundreds of years without it. That should call for us to redefine what is actually a necessity, and what is simply a choice.

I am part of a generation that has always had a phone and television, but my parents were born before the Great Depression, and started their lives, and even their marriages with horses as their main transportation resource other than walking. It is tough to get a kid these days to walk to the garbage can with their soda can! My parents had to walk miles every day to school, after they did whatever chores they had to do in the morning before school. In less than a century, life has changed drastically in this country. I know I sound like every old fuddy-duddy that has ever complained about "the young folks these days". That isn't even my point though when it comes to wasting our resources though. Resource isn't just about money. Resources can be anything of value to which we have access, like friends. I have a lot more friends than money these days, and I know I am not alone.

Our family's financial problems are a microcosm of America's financial problems. After World War 2, we had a burst of prosperity that was unprecedented in this country. From the leisure this gave people came the inspiration that gave rise to widespread re-invention to everything we already did, but it allowed us to do it with less effort and ingenuity. A lot of what we came up with is really good and valuable, but not everything has turned out so well. A lot of our conveniences have contributed to the ills of our society today that we all decry. Convenience food has gotten mom out of the kitchen, but it also forced her to go make a living outside the home to pay for the extra cost of convenience. It has also contributed to obesity and indolence. Stress and illness follow on the heels of all this overload, and we find ourselves not better off, but worse in many different identifiable ways. We all seem to be in a vicious spiraling-down of well-being that can be directly and indirectly related to lifestyle.

I am looking for a way out of the mess I've gotten myself into. I want a compromise between enjoying convenience and damaging my health and prosperity. I don't want to give up all my conveniences, but I want to down-size. I don't want a complete disconnect from techology, but I want physical and psychological health to be the priority in my life over convenience. Technology should enhance our lives and relationships, not take them over. Getting my van repaired this week led to spending quality time with my friends in person rather than on Facebook. It got me thinking about my time and my pocketbook, and it was a lot of fun. And it cost a heck of a lot less!